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Thursday, December 30, 2010

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Prediction

LATER this week the Met Office will bombard us with one of the most bizarre pieces of propaganda since the Iraqi information minister tried to convince the world that Saddam’s forces were driving out the infidel even when US planes were clearly bombing the city behind him.



We are going to be asked to believe that 2010 was either the hottest or second hottest year the world has ever recorded. I don’t know why anyone would trust the Met Office’s statistics on global temperature given that they are still compiled by some of the same scientists who were caught trying to use “tricks” to adjust previous data. So writes Ross Clark in the Daily Express

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

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TAX or Charity

It can't be both

Now fuck off Cameron.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

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I hear the sound of Tumbrels*

The average price for a litre of unleaded petrol on British forecourts is 123.26p. Of this, 57.19p is fuel tax, 18.36p is VAT, while the actual cost of the fuel is only 47.71p.

In the case of fuel, the taxman takes a double cut because VAT is applied to the cost of the petrol inclusive of fuel tax. Essentially, you have to pay tax on the tax you pay to buy your fuel.

It really is time to rise up and slaughter them!

*Tumbrel: a farm dumpcart for carrying shit; carts of this type were used by the hoi polloi to carry politicians and the other undeserving to the guillotine during the French Revolution.

Two of the benefits of the tumbrel........(1) it doesn't need petrol. (2) it can be pulled by the stronger politicians and the other undeserving to the guillotine.

Monday, December 27, 2010

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Julia Slingo

Professor Slingo, who is in charge of Britain's biggest research team investigating climate change, insisted that global warming was a reality despite the bitterly cold temperatures and heavy snowfalls that have " brought much of the country to a standstill. "

"This is not a global event; it is very much confined to the UK and Western Europe and if you look out of your window today, you will see that it is warm............ it is starting to thaw"



The key message is that global warming continues

Saturday, December 25, 2010

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Santa's Sack

Have you ever wondered how Father Christmas manages to fit all the presents he needs into just one sack?



Seasons Felicitations

Friday, December 24, 2010

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Melty Christmas


Waes hael

Thursday, December 23, 2010

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Don't laugh at me 'Cause I'm A Fool'.

A remarkable transformation

From Wisdom to Mr Bean (that's Norman Wisdom)

Creating chaos out of coalition









The Business Secretary MP for Twickenham Vince Cable has hit back over the newspaper sting which left him clinging to his Cabinet job saying that it undermined the work of MPs. The Daily Telegraph had done "great damage" by recording what he and other Liberal Democrat ministers thought were private conversations with constituents.

Well fuck me Vince, what was it that you said back in 2006 about political Hypocrisy.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

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Never stand behind an elephant




The Queen’s head could disappear from British stamps as part of controversial plans to sell off the Royal Mail, it was revealed last night. Sunday Mail





The Queens head or the European Unions elephant arse, it really makes no difference.

I stopped believing in God, Queen and Country when the Lisbon treaty was ratified.



The Government are selling off the Royal Mail because the European Union has said it must

Saturday, December 18, 2010

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Jolly hockey stick


Friday, December 17, 2010

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10 billion Euro's Mr Cameron

The Bank of England and European Central Bank (ECB) are today announcing a temporary reciprocal swap agreement (swap line).



This precautionary measure would enable the ECB to provide sterling liquidity to its counterparties. If requested, the Bank of England will provide the ECB with sterling in exchange for euro up to a limit of £10bn. The agreement expires on 30th September 2011.

http://www.bankofengland.co.uk/publications/news/2010/148.htm

Fat fingers Mr Cameron!

Monday, December 13, 2010

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Dead currency for dead men

In a research paper published today, the Centre for Economics and Business Research (CEBR) claims that keeping "the euro alive will require cuts in living standards greater than the UK faced in the Second World War"

"There is no modern history of falling living standards in peacetime on the scale necessary to keep the euro in its current form. This is why I think there is at best a one-in-five chance that the euro will survive as it is," Douglas McWilliams, CEBR chief executive.




In mythology, a ferryman carries the souls of the newly deceased across the river Styx that divides the world of the living from the world of the dead.

A coin was placed in the mouth of the dead to pay for the passage.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

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HMG take note...

I am not going to pay tax on any outcome developed from what has been agreed at Cancun (or it's UN predecessor agreements) or any tax that can be related and generated by the UN or European Union.

Hey Ken C whatareyougonnadonow.

see you in court

Saturday, December 11, 2010

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Green is the new Black

The Cancun agreement

My Lords (Oxburgh) Ladies (Slingo types) and gentlemen (Muir Russell) …it all comes down to ...... dotting the i’s and crossing the t’s

However, there is no ‘I’ or ‘T’ in Cancun

unless.....you are particularly skilful in spin.

I CAN............T's

Note:…a low hanging fruit = low to the ground.

Strange fruit = green is the new black
.


JUST FOLLOW THE THOUGHT PROCESS.

see you in court

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

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wonga woofta

Rent Boy

Anglo Saxon Dictionary
(politically correct term for a 'male' homosexual prostitute.)
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Thank god they didn't book him on Easy Jet

Sunday, December 05, 2010

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The Wavestick Honey trap

To be or not two bee but four bee
or eight bee
16 bee
32 bee
a hive
queen bee
Polly Toynbee


save yourself a tena
Don't laugh....you might wet yourself..
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Liberal Democrats

Leiurus quinquestriatus



One day, a yellow scorpion was walking along a river bank, wondering how to get to the other side.

All of a sudden the yellow scorpion saw a toad.

He asked the toad to take him on his back across the river.
The toad said, “No, If I do that, you'll sting me and I will drown.”

The scorpion assured the toad, “If I was to sting you, we would both drown.”

The toad thought about it and finally agreed and the yellow scorpion climbed up on the toads back. The toad began to swim... but.... halfway across the river, the yellow scorpion stung the toad.

As the poison filled his veins, the toad turned to the scorpion and said, “Why did you do that? You know that we will both drown.”

“I couldn't help it,” said the yellow scorpion. “It is my nature.” I am a Liberal Democrat and that's what us yellow scorpions do.

Thursday, December 02, 2010

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England Bid for the Winter Olympics

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Why is your tax bill so high

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The Wrong Kind of Bid



Qatar wins bid to hold the winter Olympics

Wednesday, December 01, 2010

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Son of Brown



David Cameron has said he would prefer to be "a child of Thatcher than a son of Brown" during clashes with Ed Miliband at Prime Minister's Questions
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Cancun ts

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Groundhog Day 16

EU accounts not signed off… for the 16th consecutive year

You wont have read this in the MSN but The European Union Court of Auditors has refused to sign off the EU accounts for yet another year, making this the 16th year in a row that the EU accounts have failed to receive a clean bill of health.



This year’s report found discrepancies in 90% of last year’s EU budget, and yet the European Parliament is currently demanding a 2011 budget increase of 6%, which has, unsurprisingly, gone down like a lead balloon with cash-strapped and budget-slashing national governments.
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